Stayed Home From Church Today and Did Some Worshipping

For me, the connection between eating and worship has been mindblowing. I've come to realize that many Christian clichés held real meaning once, perhaps a hundred years ago, but we often don’t grasp their significance until we experience them ourselves. I always heard about having a personal relationship with Christ, but I didn’t truly understand what that meant until I started preparing my meals after my healing from psoriasis.

I’ve never viewed myself as a great cook. I could grill, but my results weren't based on any specific guidelines. I had a few meals I could prepare, but now I’ve learned to make so many dishes, I had to narrow down my favorites to 30 to avoid feeling overwhelmed. My life isn’t about discovering new recipes—I enjoy focusing on these 30 meals and mastering them with each attempt.

Now, I’m not only enjoying the best food I’ve ever had, better than what I've experienced in restaurants, but the entire process of making a meal—from grocery shopping to ending with a clean kitchen—is incredibly rewarding. Interestingly, eating the meal itself might be the least fulfilling part of the experience. Three key aspects transform each meal into a worship experience that reveals God’s love to me every time I eat. I emphasize that this is a personal relationship with God because these reasons resonate with me and will not apply to others. However, I believe everyone can find great joy in insignificant things, as I do since God doesn’t show favoritism.

Ironically, I spent much of my life dining out, thinking that a different atmosphere would bring me more pleasure. However, no restaurant can compete with the comfort of my kitchen and the environment I create while enjoying my meals.

The first aspect is TikTok. In the past, it was a tool that led me to the hospital and harmed my liver. I couldn’t drink without scrolling through TikTok, and I couldn't scroll without drinking—together, they formed a marriage in hell. After waking up in the hospital, I despided TikTok. Nevertheless, at one point, I craved Italian food and needed recipes. I stumbled upon a recipe for spaghetti pie and made it, although I didn’t eat any of it at the time due to colitis. As I began to heal, I started using TikTok again for various conveniences, including recipe searching. It’s remarkable—whatever someone wants to eat, there are usually at least five people making step-by-step videos showing how to prepare that dish. I can select the best one and follow the instructions. It's incredible how many individuals share their skills and knowledge freely, just like the church is meant to operate: these people find joy in sharing their gifts with the world, and I benefit from their expertise without the usual trial and error or costs.

The second aspect is my gift for implementation. Some people thrive on music; others love art or working with their hands, while some enjoy reading and studying. I have a talent for breaking things down into steps and creating systems to streamline processes. That’s all cooking is. I approach theology similarly. At one point, I told someone that I was the smartest person alive 😨. I was so freaking wrong. Lol. I just had a gift fir implemenation. I’ve written books that I struggle to emotionally understand.

For most people, cooking starts with choosing a meal followed by gathering the necessary ingredients. This can take about an hour in the grocery store if they are somewhat organized, navigating different aisles. I used to do this, and it felt nearly impossible to go through the aisles and select various foods for different meals. Most people grocery shop in a rush, grabbing what they need without much thought. When they come home, their kitchens are often chaotic, and cleaning up can be just as time-consuming. Cooking in an unorganized kitchen can be exhausting and hinder success. Additionally, one needs to locate pots and cooking utensils, wasting more time if an item is misplaced.

On average, it would take at least two hours before I even started cooking. Once I begin, many people cook instinctively, trying to figure out when things are ready. The more complex the recipe, the more perilous the potential mistakes can be. Even if they have a timer, they still need to check constantly. After the cooking is done, cleaning can take an additional 45 minutes. This entire process is for a meal that takes only about ten minutes to consume or to serve something that a family may not fully appreciate. Sometimes, it just seems easier to order a pizza or go out to eat. However, junk food can be harmful, and when dining out, you never truly know who is preparing your meal. That is an actual Seinfeld episode.

On the other hand, I am like Batman. I get step-by-step recipes from TikTok, already know what the ingredients are, and order them online for delivery to my door. I have a specific place for my groceries, so I know exactly where everything is. When I cook, I have the directions in front of me and a video showing me the process. 

First, I take out my pants and then my cooking utensils. I have a bowl for my best utensils, a utility drawer for everyday utensils, and another drawer for unique utensils. I can tell you exactly where my pizza cutter, kitchen scissors, and rubber tongs are—without even looking. Next, I take out my condiments or basters, which are kept near the stove. I grab my seasonings, also near the stove, and put them in a glass dish. I keep my utility towel hanging by the kitchen door. Then, I take my ingredients out of the refrigerator. I use my phone to set a timer for each item, and it's programmed to notify me when something is ready, needs to be flipped, or should be taken out. 

While all of this is happening, I clean as I go. Thanks to the instructions, I can create exactly what is shown in the video about 90% of the time. Most of the time, when I leave the kitchen with my plate, it's as clean as when I started cooking. The entire process brings me pleasure.

But what truly makes of expression of God's love and a form of worship is my distinct relationship with God. When I had psoriasis, I also suffered from colitis and ascites. My liver wasn't processing food properly, so anything I ate made me nauseous. Eventually, all I could eat was chicken noodle soup without throwing up, and then just crackers. I lost 50 pounds because I couldn't eat. Doctors told me I might never be able to have salt again. If I managed to eat a little of something, my belly would swell so much that it caused intense discomfort and pain, sending me to the hospital where they would drain the fluid out of my stomach with a 12-inch needle. This was done weekly. As soon as they drained the fluid, my stomach would start filling up again.

Being able to make and eat whatever I want is nothing short of a miracle. Every time I eat something I've cooked, it's God's way of showing me how much He loves me.

So that's why eating for me is worshiping God. It has become a declaration of His Gospel and His redeeming love.