I Volunteered

Sometimes I Cant Figure God Out...

Sometimes I ask, and He answers.

Sometimes I ask, and He waits — and in that waiting, I start to travail.

A comedian once said none of us even know how a microphone works.

And he’s right.

We trust the sound more than we understand the wiring.

So I’ll trust God’s voice even when I don’t get how the signal’s coming through.

I refuse to pretend like Calvinists — clinging to doctrines that contradict the character of the God I’m seeking.

If I’m seeking His face and I don’t know something, then the honest answer is:

“He hasn't told me yet.”

But I’m still here.

I’m still asking.

Because I’m Caleb.

I volunteered.

> “Whom shall I send?”

“Here I am. Send me.” (Isaiah 6:8)

And the real mystery isn’t why I volunteered —

The real mystery is: Why didn’t they?

Why do they not see what I see?

Why does the Spirit not burn in them the way He burns in me?

And then I remember:

> “When the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all truth.” (John 16:13)

I’m not inventing this.

I’m not strategizing this.

I’m not branding this.

I’m being taught.

So I’ll keep walking like Caleb.

Keep watching like Isaiah.

Keep writing what I didn’t make up — because it burns, and it’s true.